If I Was Your Girl

This book has been on my TBR (to be read) pile for several months, mostly because based on the cover,  I needed to be in the mood for another girl lit romance. There is something about this cover that reminds me of a Nazi/Holocaust book, but I cannot place it. So maybe it was a lack of identity that kept me unmotivated to crack it open. For whatever reason, then, despite having access to a digital advanced copy, I let it sit in my Kindle, get published, and start to disappear into the rabbit hole that is my TBR pile.

That was a mistake.

This is the first book I have read by a transgender woman creating a fictional story about a transgender teen who not only has already transitioned, but also passes. She leaves her mother in Atlanta after she gets beaten up to live with her father in a small southern town and try to finish up her senior year. She is coming off of a recent hospitalization after she tried to commit suicide.

The secret of her being trans is not a spoiler. It is in the description and it is in the author's note at the beginning. But the secret, for Amanda, is difficult to keep. She wants to live a real life and hiding her truth from others keeps her from being authentic. The secret then is if she will tell, when and to what consequence.

I like Amanda's angst. I don't know how realistic it is, but if feels authentic. What makes reading so powerful is that it allows us to travel into other worlds and other cultures. Like Atticus says in To Kill a Mockingbird, "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view. . .until you climb in his skin and walk around in it.

I think the end is a little saccharine. But fiction allows us to suspend the ugly in the world and hold up hope like a beacon. I wish this had a better cover. Maybe one without a girl on it so that Amanda can be exactly how each reader imagines her to be. Otherwise, this is a good start to more stories like this.

Fawkes

Publication date: July 10, 2018
*an advanced digital copy received by the publisher and Net Galley for an honest review

My thoughts:

It is England in 1604. King James of Scotland is on the throne after his cousin Queen Elizabeth dies after 45 years on the throne. The Plague settles in. Catholic associates, including Guy Fawkes plot to murder Protestant King James as well as Parliament. That is the cut and dry facts of history, but what makes history so enticing is that below the facts are real people that fought and loved and hoped and suffered. 

This story combines the facts of the Gun Powder Plot in London but tells a human story through the eyes of young Thomas Fawkes, fictional son of Guy Fawkes. It takes on issues of human rights, intrigue, class wars but adds in a sprinkling of fantasy and magic. I realize I am a sucker for a good fantasy book and the Harry Potter series is evidence that millions of readers love to read about young characters finding their own magical powers. 

Finally, the fantasy element added to the historical element will hopefully get readers to want to read more about this time and seek out those primary sources that tell more stories about the real people living in those times. The one thing that is missing that I would have liked to see are resources of primary sources to learn more about Fawkes, his co-conspirators, the Plagues and the monarchy as there are teachable moments packaged in an engaging story.

Description:

Thomas Fawkes is turning to stone, and the only cure to the Stone Plague is to join his father’s plot to assassinate the king of England.

Silent wars leave the most carnage. The wars that are never declared, but are carried out in dark alleys with masks and hidden knives. Wars where color power alters the natural rhythm of 17th century London. And when the king calls for peace, no one listens until he finally calls for death.

But what if death finds him first?

Keepers think the Igniters caused the plague. Igniters think the Keepers did it. But all Thomas knows is that the Stone Plague infecting his eye is spreading. And if he doesn’t do something soon, he’ll be a lifeless statue. So when his Keeper father, Guy Fawkes, invites him to join the Gunpowder Plot—claiming it will put an end to the plague—Thomas is in.

The plan: use 36 barrels of gunpowder to blow up the Igniter King.

The problem: Doing so will destroy the family of the girl Thomas loves. But backing out of the plot will send his father and the other plotters to the gallows. To save one, Thomas will lose the other.

No matter Thomas’s choice, one thing is clear: once the decision is made and the color masks have been put on, there’s no turning back.

June reading challenge: Father Knows Best: read a book that features a father

Far From the Tree

My thoughts:

I have seen this book touted as "for people who love This Is Us." I am not sure if it holds the same chapter by chapter intensity as the television show holds, but this definitely will have appeal to YA readers. I would have devoured this book except that I had to keep returning it to the library and waiting on the "holds" list until it came around to me again. 

This is the story of searching and finding a family you did not know you had. It is about heartache and hope as it interweaves the stories of three teens. Read worthy.

From the pages:

And I finally learned to ride, but I wouldn't let them take the wheels off because I liked that feeling, you know? They caught me every time. That's what it felt like with Grace and Maya. Like I was falling, but then I didn't. They were there. - Joaquin

Dark Nights: Metal: The Resistance

Publication date: Jul 3 2018

This is another in the Metal family of dark rock and roll. I like this one the best because it is a large family reunion of sorts for the DC genealogy.  This one is like Harry Potter looking for the hoarcruxs across space and time. The Justice League sets out to find artifacts to protect the earth. In the meantime, the other characters like the Suicide Squad are stuck in a losing battle to save a very warped Gotham. Lots of destruction. Lots of evil in the multiverse. Lots of action.

Description:

The Nightmare Batmen have descended to Earth from the events of DARK NIGHTS: METAL. Against an army of Dark Knights, can members of the Justice League, Teen Titans and Suicide Squad come together to form a resistance to stop them?

The Justice League has scattered around the world to find the only artifacts that can fight back against the invasion of the Dark Multiverse. The League thinks they know how to take back their world, but they are not prepared for who is standing in their way: the Seven Dark Knights of the Dark Multiverse. All the brilliance of Batman, but combinedwith the powers of the Flash, Aquaman, Cyborg and more... and none of the morals. 

The shocking events of METAL have transformed Gotham City into a mosaic of fantastical realms full of monsters, magic and doom An SOS from Dick Grayson sends Robin back to Gotham to find a number of hometown heroes (and anti-heroes) including Batgirl, Harley Quinn, Killer Croc, Black Canary and Green Arrow all trapped in a labyrinth of madness and death! Meanwhile, the Justice League are trapped in pocket worlds with their evil Batmen counterparts! Will the heroes be able to escape in time to fight against the villainous mastermind Barbatos? 

Filling in the gaps between issues of DARK NIGHTS: METAL, this tie-in graphic novel is a crucial companion story to Scott Snyder and Greg Capullo's masterpiece! Written and illustrated by some of the top talents in the industry, including Jeff Lemire, Joshua Williamson, Bryan Hitch, Liam Sharp, Howard Porter, Robert Venditti and more, this book collects THE FLASH #33, HAL JORDAN AND THE GREEN LANTERN CORPS #32, JUSTICE LEAGUE #32-33, HAWKMAN: FOUND #1, TEEN TITANS #12, NIGHTWING #29, SUICIDE SQUAD #26, GREEN ARROW #32, BATMAN: LOST #1 and HAWKMAN FOUND #1.

An advanced copy provided by Net Galley and the publisher for an honest review.

Dark Nights: Metal: Dark Knights Rising

Publication date: June 26, 2018

My Thoughts:

This is a side story, a 1.5.1 in the Dark Nights: Metal saga of death and destruction across the multiverse. The beginning of this series says it best: 

Imagine if your every fear, each decision gave birth to a malformed world of nightmare. . .Welcome to the dark multiverse. Home to stories that should never be. . .

This opening explains the gist of these stories and I dare you to not have Led Zeppelin's "Immigrant Song" playing in the background as you tear through these stories of destruction and mayhem. Batman has always been dark, now we know how dark. This is indeed heavy metal rock n roll in comic form. 

Description:

Seven nightmarish versions of Batman from seven dying alternate realities have been recruited by the dark god Barbatos to terrorize the World’s Greatest Heroes in our universe. They threaten life across the Multiverse, and the Justice League may be powerless to stop them! 

 We introduce you to:
The Batman Who Laughs: a lunatic driven mad by his world’s Joker. 
The Red Death: a thief who stole his reality’s Speed Force power.
The Drowned: a female, amphibious Batman. 
The Dawnbreaker: a twisted Green Lantern.
The Murder Machine: a deranged, deadly cyborg.
The Merciless: a warrior who wears the helmet of Ares.
The Devastator: a part-human, part-Doomsday monster. Featuring stories from Scott Snyder, James Tynion IV, Peter J. Tomasi, Grant Morrison, Joshua Williamson, Ethan Van Sciver, Philip Tan, Tyler Kirkham, Francis Manapul, Riley Rossmo, Tony S. Daniel, Howard Porter, Doug Mahnke and many more! Collects the seven Dark Nights: Batman tie-in one-shots and Dark Knights Rising: The Wild Hunt #1. 

An advanced digital copy provided by Net Galley and the publisher for an honest review.

Dark Nights Metal: Deluxe Edition

My thoughts:

This collection follows Dark Days: The Road to Metal and is both a conclusion and a segue for more to come. This is for readers that can see this as a new DC movie because although it doesn't have an end, the appeal of heroes who tap into the sense of goodness and hope amidst darkness comes through. When the more suicidal heroes want to give up, the more stable heroes bring them back. That is what makes the "comicverse" and these heroes immortal over generations of readers. 

I apologize to the writers and the publisher for mixing worlds and heading to Marvel for inspiration but the quote is so appropriate to this book and gets to the heart of the message:

It is easy to feel hopeful on a beautiful day like today, but there will be dark days ahead of us too. There will be days when you feel all alone, and that's when hope is needed most. No matter how buried it gets, or how lost you feel, you must promise me that you will  hold on to hope. Keep it alive. We have to be greater than what we suffer. -- Gwen Stacy, The Amazing Spiderman 2

Description:

The New York Times bestselling BATMAN writer and artist team of Scott Snyder and Greg Capullo re-unite in the epic event graphic novel DARK NIGHTS: METAL!

 The Dark Knight has uncovered one of the lost mysteries of the universe...one that could destroy the very fabric of the DC Universe! The dark corners of reality that have never been seen till now! The Dark Multiverse is revealed in all its devastating danger--a team of twisted, evil versions of Batman hellbent on destroying the DC Universe! 

 With appearances from heroes, villains and faces long forgotten, DARK NIGHTS: METAL will examine every choice a hero doesn't take and every path they don't walk, and open up worlds that are forged by nightmares. 

  Together on a single title for an outstanding fifty issues, Snyder and Capullo's award-winning stories BATMAN VOL. 1: THE COURT OF OWLS, BATMAN VOL. 3: DEATH OF THE FAMILY and BATMAN VOL. 7: ENDGAME turned generations of Batman fans into a global horde of Batman superfans. With DARK NIGHTS: METAL, Scott and Greg will build on this strong foundation and broaden the scope of their storytelling to encompass the full expanse of the DC Universe.

An advanced digital copy provided by Net Galley and the publisher for an honest review.

Not the Girls You're Looking For

Publication date: June 19, 2018

From the publisher:

Lulu Saad doesn't need your advice, thank you very much. She's got her three best friends and nothing can stop her from conquering the known world. Sure, for half a minute she thought she’d nearly drowned a cute guy at a party, but he was totally faking it. And fine, yes, she caused a scene during Ramadan. It's all under control. Ish.

Except maybe this time she’s done a little more damage than she realizes. And if Lulu can't find her way out of this mess soon, she'll have to do more than repair friendships, family alliances, and wet clothing. She'll have to go looking for herself.

Debut author Aminah Mae Safi's honest and smart novel is about how easy it can be to hurt those around you even if —especially if—you love them.

My thoughts:
I got to about 12% of this book and thought I just could not stomach any more of Lulu Saad. I realize now that maybe this cover threw me off because she acts much younger than she should as a junior in high school and the cover makes it seem like she is a junior in college. The character was just too immature and I could not stand her "voice."

However, I am glad I stuck it out. Like Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, this is a  no apologies chick book that will appeal to girls from middle school on. The fact that the main character is half Arabic/Muslim, half white and all American with a trio of friends that are not culturally similar to each other is a perk. It definitely makes the dynamic more interesting, especially in the fact that this story does not highlight or glamorize their differences. The problems are universal problems about growing up and growing apart, as well as what it takes to hold friendships together. Finally, although place does not play as strong a part in this book as it could, the fact that it takes place in Texas lends a little context to what is going on in the story.

This DAC was supplied by the publisher and Net Galley for an honest review.

Number One Chinese Restaurant

Description:

Named a Most Anticipated Book of 2018 by The Millions and Cosmopolitan

An exuberant and wise multigenerational debut novel about the complicated lives and loves of people working in everyone’s favorite Chinese restaurant.

The Beijing Duck House in Rockville, Maryland, is not only a beloved go-to setting for hunger pangs and celebrations; it is its own world, inhabited by waiters and kitchen staff who have been fighting, loving, and aging within its walls for decades. When disaster strikes, this working family’s controlled chaos is set loose, forcing each character to confront the conflicts that fast-paced restaurant life has kept at bay.

Owner Jimmy Han hopes to leave his late father’s homespun establishment for a fancier one. Jimmy’s older brother, Johnny, and Johnny’s daughter, Annie, ache to return to a time before a father’s absence and a teenager’s silence pushed them apart. Nan and Ah-Jack, longtime Duck House employees, are tempted to turn their thirty-year friendship into something else, even as Nan’s son, Pat, struggles to stay out of trouble. And when Pat and Annie, caught in a mix of youthful lust and boredom, find themselves in a dangerous game that implicates them in the Duck House tragedy, their families must decide how much they are willing to sacrifice to help their children.

Generous in spirit, unaffected in its intelligence, multi-voiced, poignant, and darkly funny, Number One Chinese Restaurant looks beyond red tablecloths and silkscreen murals to share an unforgettable story about youth and aging, parents and children, and all the ways that our families destroy us while also keeping us grounded and alive.

My thoughts:

With the high praise and "Most Anticipated Book of 2018" label, I was hoping for a more entertaining novel. I really was craving for either the humor, angst and melodrama of a Joy Luck Club or a foodie book like The Last Chinese Chef. The issue was that I could not find any character that I wanted to root for. I could not find a character with enough redeeming qualities to care about. 

I know it is supposed to be darkly funny, I just don't get the humor. I think what I wanted to do was read this book to be entertained, but bitterness is a hard pill to swallow, even in fiction. 

Publication date: June 19, 2018

Advanced digital copy provided by Net Galley and the publisher for an honest review. 

Just Under the Clouds

Description:

Can you still have a home if you don't have a house? In the spirit of The Truth About Jellyfish and Fish in a Tree comes a stunning debut about a family struggling to find something lasting when everything feels so fleeting.

Always think in threes and you'll never fall, Cora's father told her when she was a little girl. Two feet, one hand. Two hands, one foot. That was all Cora needed to know to climb the trees of Brooklyn.

But now Cora is a middle schooler, a big sister, and homeless. Her mother is trying to hold the family together after her father's death, and Cora must look after her sister, Adare, who's just different, their mother insists. Quick to smile, Adare hates wearing shoes, rarely speaks, and appears untroubled by the question Cora can't help but ask: How will she find a place to call home? 

After their room at the shelter is ransacked, Cora's mother looks to an old friend for help, and Cora finally finds what she has been looking for: Ailanthus altissima, the "tree of heaven," which can grow in even the worst conditions. It sets her on a path to discover a deeper truth about where she really belongs. 

Just Under the Clouds will take root in your heart and blossom long after you've turned the last page.

My Thoughts:

I like the last sentence of the description by the publisher "Just Under the Clouds will take root." It is heart breaking and sweet and I cannot help but root for these characters. Cora, as the big sister who must be older than she wants to be has so much hurt and pain that she must swallow and I just wanted to yell at the mother to wake up!!! I know that when adults are sad and barely holding it together, it is ever more difficult for children. I also know that when adults cannot get their sadness under control, sometimes other adults need to step in to take care of the children, especially as they leave middle school and go to high school. I just felt like if the mom didn't really look at Cora, and try to understand what she was hiding, she would lose her within a few years. 

Perhaps that is why this story got so rooted in me. I could see the future for this little family and I just hoped that by the end of the book, I would be reassured that the future I could see was not going to come to pass. That kind of dread, waiting for the third strike, makes this kind of reading both gripping and daunting. 

This is a solid middle level read that will appeal to both males and females. I personally chose this to fulfill my Goodreads summer June challenge for It's the End of the World: Read a book about the end of the world as we know it. For Cora, this is the end of the world. Her floating, untethered existence, her feet anchored when all she wants to do is climb, the letters that do not turn into numbers, the loss of a father, these are all part of Cora living at the end of the world. This is not a dystopia. This is real life shoving your head under the water.

Digital advanced copy provided by Net Galley and the publisher for an honest review

Summer 2018 reading lists

June 1 is a day that is full of potential and promise of long nights of reading and although I already have a full Kindle of books to read, I like the excitement of reading lists. Who knows, perhaps this summer. . .

Austin Kleon, author of Steal Like an Artist shares his here. Like his personality, this is for the philosophical artist. 

BBC Culture polled authors, journalists and "literary types" across 35 countries and asked them to nominate 5 fictional stories that shaped their mindset or influenced history. The top 5 is here.  Of the 5 there is only one American (Harriet Beecher Stowe) and one African (Nigeria's Chinua Achebe). I think the world is still stuck on classic "canonical" books but if you have not read these, definitely start with Things Fall Apart.

Bookish has a monthly book club pics list for YA and June is not out but here is May The YA market is so dynamic that this is how I get an idea of new books to add to my to read list.

Goodreads has a summer reading challenge. There is a beginner level and an expert level here. I think the middle level, which I am doing is to take from both lists, use only YA, middle level reads and if something I read does not exactly fit, use my experience with middle school thinkers to justify how it should count. 

And now to get reading. I am currently reading:

This is for the category It's the End of the World: read a book about the end of the world as we know it. The description is below, which will look like it does not fit, but when you are a middle schooler and your father has died and you are homeless with a special needs little sister and a mother who is just trying to hold it together, this is the end of the world. 

Can you still have a home if you don't have a house?

Always think in threes and you'll never fall, Cora's father told her when she was a little girl. Two feet, one hand. Two hands, one foot. That was all Cora needed to know to climb the trees of Brooklyn.

But now Cora is a middle schooler, a big sister, and homeless. Her mother is trying to hold the family together after her father's death, and Cora must look after her sister, Adare, who's just different, their mother insists. Quick to smile, Adare hates wearing shoes, rarely speaks, and appears untroubled by the question Cora can't help but ask: How will she find a place to call home?

After their room at the shelter is ransacked, Cora's mother looks to an old friend for help, and Cora finally finds what she has been looking for: Ailanthus altissima, the "tree of heaven," which can grow in even the worst conditions. It sets her on a path to discover a deeper truth about where she really belongs.